Thursday, June 07, 2007

Tact, A Lost Art?

So, as I have been trying to round up volunteers to help create, what will be, my mothers memorial gardens I am finding that some people around here never learned about a little something called "Tact". I have had a few really great people willing to carry on my moms memory and totally into helping but unfortunately I have had more than that be downright rude (well, IMO its rude). For Example, I asked one couple (friends of my mother) and the husband kinda seemed annoyed that I was asking and quickly said No, he had some things going on. The wife never responded so I asked her if she was interested and she said "ME, No Way, not my thing!" Her tone was pretty adamant about how this was TRULY not her thing. I wanted to say, "NO, your right, its not your thing, its my moms thing and we were wanting to see if you could take a little time out of your day and help out. " This is unfortunately just one example, I could go on but you get the idea. What ever happened to people, at least, being polite about saying no? Like "OH, I would LOVE to, I really loved your mom but we are really busy next weekend with some things and since this is so last minute we just don't think that we could do it" (said in a sympathetic & apologetic tone). Maybe its because I am from the South but I would Way rather hear that. I notice the lack of tact allot more here in the Midwest and I wonder if its a culture thing or maybe I am just older and more aware. Plus with this specific issue, we are dealing with my deceased mother you would think people would be abit more compassionate in their tone (God forbid they actually volunteer. lol).
OH, and Thank you SOOOOOOO much to all those who have volunteered!! I appreciate it more than you know!!!! You All Rock!

Friday, June 01, 2007

In Memory of Mom

Well, my computer is down for a bit due to a broken adapter but my husband has graciously allowed me to use his computer. :) LOL!
I am in the midst of trying to organize volenteers for my mothers memorial gardens at her last place of employment (somewhat of a halfway house for mentally ill women) My mom had a heart as big as Texas and she Loved what she did, which was helping others. She always wanted the ladies to be able to have a little retreat outside of the home that they could escape to for some down time. She always talked of making the backyard into some tranquil gardens but as a non profit agency it was a little hard to fund. Well, thanks to all of the donations that were given in her memory and honor, Greenwich House and all volenteers are about to make my moms dream a reality. My mom would love to see this and I SOOOO wish that she could! If anyone is interested in helping please let me know because we have LOTS of space for volenteers. :)

Kind of on the same topic, I am wondering if anyone has any experience or can relate at all. I always thought that it would get easier as time went on not having my mom and I am not finding this to be true at all. In fact it seems to get worse. I think in the beginning I must have been kind of numb just because it was such a long road and we were finally at the end. But now it seems like I have a good cry at LEAST once a week. I cant seem to make this void go away. YOu know when you get really sad or frustrated or pissed off or SUPER happy or giddy or your kids do something really cute or gross, etc... and you just want to call your mom and tell her about it(because God knows no one else will sit and talk to your baby on the phone for 10 minues when they arent really saying anything or listen to you tell boring stories of what that same child did today and actually be as interested as you are in telling it)? Anyway, I get that all the time and I cant call her anymore. It just Sucks!! Anyway, sorry for being a downer, I just wonder when it gets better or if it ever does? Ughhhh....now I'm crying again! Good Lord, sometimes being a girl is so frustrating! :)
I do have to say thanks to my SIL and best friend Elizabeth (and John for marrying her) because now that I cant call my mom I just call E and make her listen to all that stuff and she does it happily (I think). lol! Thanks, Love You.