Tact, A Lost Art?

So, as I have been trying to round up volunteers to help create, what will be, my mothers memorial gardens I am finding that some people around here never learned about a little something called "Tact". I have had a few really great people willing to carry on my moms memory and totally into helping but unfortunately I have had more than that be downright rude (well, IMO its rude). For Example, I asked one couple (friends of my mother) and the husband kinda seemed annoyed that I was asking and quickly said No, he had some things going on. The wife never responded so I asked her if she was interested and she said "ME, No Way, not my thing!" Her tone was pretty adamant about how this was TRULY not her thing. I wanted to say, "NO, your right, its not your thing, its my moms thing and we were wanting to see if you could take a little time out of your day and help out. " This is unfortunately just one example, I could go on but you get the idea. What ever happened to people, at least, being polite about saying no? Like "OH, I would LOVE to, I really loved your mom but we are really busy next weekend with some things and since this is so last minute we just don't think that we could do it" (said in a sympathetic & apologetic tone). Maybe its because I am from the South but I would Way rather hear that. I notice the lack of tact allot more here in the Midwest and I wonder if its a culture thing or maybe I am just older and more aware. Plus with this specific issue, we are dealing with my deceased mother you would think people would be abit more compassionate in their tone (God forbid they actually volunteer. lol).
OH, and Thank you SOOOOOOO much to all those who have volunteered!! I appreciate it more than you know!!!! You All Rock!

In Memory of Mom

Well, my computer is down for a bit due to a broken adapter but my husband has graciously allowed me to use his computer. :) LOL!
I am in the midst of trying to organize volenteers for my mothers memorial gardens at her last place of employment (somewhat of a halfway house for mentally ill women) My mom had a heart as big as Texas and she Loved what she did, which was helping others. She always wanted the ladies to be able to have a little retreat outside of the home that they could escape to for some down time. She always talked of making the backyard into some tranquil gardens but as a non profit agency it was a little hard to fund. Well, thanks to all of the donations that were given in her memory and honor, Greenwich House and all volenteers are about to make my moms dream a reality. My mom would love to see this and I SOOOO wish that she could! If anyone is interested in helping please let me know because we have LOTS of space for volenteers. :)

Kind of on the same topic, I am wondering if anyone has any experience or can relate at all. I always thought that it would get easier as time went on not having my mom and I am not finding this to be true at all. In fact it seems to get worse. I think in the beginning I must have been kind of numb just because it was such a long road and we were finally at the end. But now it seems like I have a good cry at LEAST once a week. I cant seem to make this void go away. YOu know when you get really sad or frustrated or pissed off or SUPER happy or giddy or your kids do something really cute or gross, etc... and you just want to call your mom and tell her about it(because God knows no one else will sit and talk to your baby on the phone for 10 minues when they arent really saying anything or listen to you tell boring stories of what that same child did today and actually be as interested as you are in telling it)? Anyway, I get that all the time and I cant call her anymore. It just Sucks!! Anyway, sorry for being a downer, I just wonder when it gets better or if it ever does? Ughhhh....now I'm crying again! Good Lord, sometimes being a girl is so frustrating! :)
I do have to say thanks to my SIL and best friend Elizabeth (and John for marrying her) because now that I cant call my mom I just call E and make her listen to all that stuff and she does it happily (I think). lol! Thanks, Love You.

Yes, I know, I am normaally bugging you with pictures of my kids but since I work at a studio I thought, "Why not get some pictures of myself?" I am the one always taking pictures in my family so we have LOTS of the kids and hubby but not so much me. Plus, Daniel has my senior picture hanging in the office and I thought he needed an update. Hey netta and Sara, do you recognize the 4th pose? Do you remember when I used to always have you take this pse of me back in the day. I can just hear me saying, "hey take a picture of me like this so it looks like I'm walking." LOL, Oh it makes me laugh just thinking about it! :)

Jacks BooBoo

I cant stop myself from laughing out loud Every time I see this picture! I know that most of you have seen this on my brothers blog but had to post it on my own. Jack was showing Daniel and I the booboo on his finger trying to convince us that he needed a band aid. He was somewhat unhappy that we got the camera out instead of a band aid hence the look on his face. How Perfect is every aspect of that picture! LMAO! I just cant enough of it. Its just so stinkin funny.

OK, on a similar topic, how cute is his hair? I just think its so cute with his long bangs. (we are trying to grow them out to match the back which isn't long) He looks like a little rugby player. :) That said, We either get people who love it or hate it and was wondering what others thought (not that that will change it, just wondering). :)

A little history....

"The bottles were designed with a integral glass tube, and a stopper. Attached to the glass tube there was a length of Indian rubber tubing, which ended with a bone mouth shield and a rubber teat. This design of bottle was impossible to keep clean and even though openly condemned by much of the medical profession of the time, continued to sell well into the 1920's. Much of this popularity was attributed to the fact that the baby could be left unattended to feed, even before the baby was old enough to hold the bottle. "

I was at work the other day and saw something that made me somewhat disturbed. It was a bottle that had a very long tube attached to it with a nipple at the end. THe child was able to eat while laying down without having to be held. I was taken back to something I had learned while doing research on the history of the bottle. One of the first bottles invented was coined "The Murder Bottle" or "The Death Bottle" because it had a tube that connected to the nipple that carried bacteria and typically caused sickness or death. I know that we obviously have better ways of cleaning and sanitizing now but it seems that people will do anything to not have to hold your child while feeding. I think if its an option then it is just too tempting. THe thing I thought was really astounding in this short article was that even after knowing the high risks mothers still chose to use this bottle into the 1920s because of the ease of being able to feed your child without holding them. What a sacrifice to have some free time! This is one of the things that when I spoke of bonding (in the comments on last post) I was referring to. A mother that nurses has no other option but to hold and cuddle their child while feeding whereas so many times (not all) with bottle feeding we get lazy and want to prop the bottle and have the child eat alone. I cant tell you how sad it makes me when I see a 3 month old feeding herself a bottle. Why are we trying ot make our kids SOOOO independent so early??? These are babies that DEPEND on our love and physical touch in order ot grow into functioning children and adults. I AM NOT saying that moms that bottle feed do not love their children!!!!!!! I think that women who choose never to attempt to breastfeed can still have that bond with their baby but I think it just takes a little more work. Babies are born with the instinct to immediately want to lay against their mother and nurse. THey have just been through a traumatic experience and lots of times they are wheeled off poked and given some unattached plastic nipple. Sounds comforting and cozy to me.

Anyway, as I have said MANY times before I think that formula is a Great invention but I think it is WAY overused. There are women who for one reason or another ( medication, medical conditions or even death) are not able to nurse and formula is something that is great to have in those situations. I just think too many woman use it because of simple convenience or because they just arent as educated and dont know. That is why I am so passionate about women being educated about this stuff and not relying solely on what their Drs say. I could go on but I will spare you all :)

I know, I know, I haven't been much of a blogger lately. I actually have somewhat of a valid excuse this time. I have been down and out with the flu for the past 2 weeks. Who knew that influenza was such a big ordeal? I think I am finally getting back to functioning at 100% though. We went to the lakehouse this weekend and it was SOOO Realaxing! Exactly what we all needed! I am sure that I have got something more intersting and contraversial to talk about but I am going to have to think about it and post in a few hours. Let me get my my controversial juices flowing. :) I will post in a little bit. Maybe I will post some pictures. :)

"Dont point your finger at CRAZYPeople!"

Girl Interupted has got such a plethera of great lines to chooses from when speaking about crazy people. If you havent seen it then go RIGHT NOW and rent it! Go....seriously, right now!!! ANyway, I was trying to help someone the other day with a dilema concerning a friend and she was talking about how she couldnt talk sense to her because she ONLY understood her own perspective and refused to listen to anyone elses. Then I started thinking about all the times that I have come into contact with people like this who I spend my time trying to resolve things with them on a rational level and we just end up where we started. The title line went through my head and I realized that, maybe, there is no point in trying to rationalize with an irrational person. You cant expect logic and reason from a person who doesnt function on that level. So, my question is this...What do you do with these situations? Do they get a free pass and are allowed to act and speak as they please because no one wants to deal with their irrational behavior or do we address it? And if we address it, how the heck do you do it??

This little piggy...

I know its a picture of feet but its cute isn't it?? I LOVE being able to do fun creative things with my kids pictures on my down time at work.
Anyway, with so much time at work I am slacking on Easter prep. Is it earlier this year than normal because it feels like it has really snuck up on me. Man, I cant believe we're already in spring!

Uhh... quick question, I have been seeing allot on the news about MSG and its huge effects on our bodies and health. I also see that it is in allot of infant formula. What the heck, first of all why are they putting it in there and why do people feed this to their babies? I have never given my kids formula so I don't really know,but do moms know what they put in this crap. I think I would probably just assume since its FDA approved then it was OK but the more I hear and read I fear we are trusting too much!

5 Years Down!

OK, I am sorry that I have been such a slacker with my blogging. This part time job hasn't been so part time lately. We are in the middle of a re staffing at work and so Des and I have been working alot. Its alot of work and surprisingly extremely tiring but I actually and REALLY enjoying it. You never know what to expect on any given day so it keeps things new and exciting. :)
Anyway, in other news, Daniel and I celebrated our 5th anniversary on Friday! YAY! I cant believe that its been that long. I guess it doesn't seem so long in the scheme of things but I remember before I was married thinking that 5 years was a long time. It really has gone super fast and really has been good. I guess time flies when your having fun. :) Plus, we've got 2 adorable boys to show for it. :)

Happy Birthday Mom!

57 yrs ago today a little girl was born and given the name of Sara Lynn. She was a blessing to So many throughout her 55 years. She did so much with what she was given. She was dealt a crappy hand in life but she made the most of it. She made lots of mistakes and had her issues but she was such an inspiration to me because she always made a point to admit her shortcomings and teach me something through them rather than deny them and allow pride to stunt any future personal growth. She always taught me to put others before myself not just in thought but in everyday actions. She is the reason that I have the compassionate heart that I do and she always reminded me to protect that character quality within myself. She was SO diligent in praying for her children and I can truly see the fruit of it today. She was a truly amazing woman that was taken from us too soon but I know that she is in heaven dancing so I can take comfort in that. :)
I could go on and on but unfortunately children and work call. Does anyone have any favorite memories that they want to share?

Holy Cuteness!!!!!

I know I am a little of a picture-aholic but how can you not be with cuteness like this staring at you all the time!

Ughhh....its just SO cute! I went in to get my free 8x10 at Picture People because I needed a close up for Jacks room but they were rude and wouldnt take me so I ended up going down to work and having Des take his pictures so that she could get some practice. Now, How fabulous are theses pictures?!?! Good job Des!

I Love Greys....Greys, Greys Greys! (said in the tone of Ron Burgendy)

Ughhhh....though it tortures me and pulls at my heartstrings I just cant get enough of that show!!!!!!!!! LOVE IT!!!! So, if you didn't see it tonight and are planning to watch it later Don't Read This!!!
So, They cant kill Meredith...I mean...its called Greys Anatomy, As in Meredith Grey!! So though they did a convincing job at making me doubt this I have to think that in the end she will come through...BUT, they did refer to the next episode as the "Devastating" conclusion. I mean, technically wasn't she kinda already pretty much gone at the end of this one? Anyway, whatever happens..this is great drama and great writing!
I just have to ask, does anyone else watch Alex from Greys and just continually see a foreign guy named Mossimo trying to gain the affections of Jennifer Lopez (The Wedding Planner). Des and I may be the only ones but I had to ask! :)

Here we go......

I am officially finished with training at work and now I have to try to apply everything that I have been taught, Ha! It was MUCH more en depth than I thought it would be. I guess it makes sense, your learning how to be a photographer basically but I think I underestimated how hard that would be. All that said, I am excited about it all. :) We have to take pictures of models for about 2 weeks to see if we know what we are doing so if any of you want your pictures taken come on down! :)

Aren't my boys cute?? I got Jacks 4 yr pictures taken the other day and as I watched my boss try to pose them and actually get Jack to smile(he HATES having his pictures taken) I realized how difficult this job would be. I just hope that all kids aren't as difficult as mine! lol! She did get some good pics in spite of all of it! Let me also say what a benefit free pictures are for someone, like myself, who is obsessed with pictures! This job will definitely come in handy! :)

Feb 6th- Happy Birthday Jack (and Ronald Reagan)

Jack and Xander @ 3 months

Jack and Mommy at 2 1/2 months

Holy Cow, Time moves SO much faster as you get older or Maybe its just after you have kids, I dont know. Anyway I cant figure out how 4 years have past since I gave birth to my first little miracle. Jack was a Huge surprise to Daniel and I, we werent quite expecting to have a baby so soon after we got married but 11 months later we realized that God had a better plan for us in the form of Jack Carter. I'm so glad that God has a better plan for us than we have for ourselves! If we had waited the 2 years that we had planned then my mom would never had been able to meet any of my children and I never would have seen the ultimate joy in her eyes when she held Jack for the first time or witness how she she LOVED to spoil all her grandchildren. As I look back, there are SO many blessings in having him when we did. One of many is how he teaches me to be a better wife and mother and is constantly challenging me to smooth out my rough edges. The fact that EVERYTHING we do is teaching them something is very daunting and challenges you to step up! Anyway, I am So very grateful for that 7lb 4 oz blessing that God gave us 4 years ago yesterday and the bigger he gets the bigger the blessing he is! Do any other parents ever feel like they are going to explode because they love their kids so much. Its Really Crazy, who knew?! :)

Sorry the pictures are when he was 2-3 months but, for some reason I dont have any newborn pics on my computer. We must not have been digital yet. :)

Blah,blah, blah...

I have some fun news to share! I will be starting my first day at work tomorrow. :O A few weeks ago as Desiree and I were getting our sons pictures taken at Kiddie Kandids we were offered a job by the manager. It was somewhat flippant but she gave us applications as we left. The more we talked about it the more doable it sounded. The clincher was being able to co-op with the kids if we had to work during the day. One of us could watch the kids when the other worked. Plus, they train you in photography and how fun is that? :) So we decided to put our apps in and leave it up to God. Well our interview was Tuesday and we start training tomorrow. Yay! I'll let you know how it goes but so far I am excited. I have moments of being overwhelmed because I remember how difficult it is to work and do everything else that is involved in being a mom. But, I feel like God laid this in our laps and so I am going to trust that our family will all work together to make it a bit easier.
On a Whole different level, Des and I went to see "Catch and Release" last night and it seeing Jen onscreen again was So fun! I know, I'm a dork but I really love my Stars and Jennifer is just so refreshing to watch! :) Anyway, it was a Great movie and you should ALL see it! Also, since we're on the subject, I just have to rave about Greys Anatomy! Any of you who don't watch it are missing out because....., well......, just because its one of the best shows on TV! ( I am sure all of you are going to watch it simply because of that review :) )The writers know how to make me cry every stinkin episode. Ughh, the issues they bring up always hit so close to home. It seems kinda therapeutic. LOL :)
Oh, went to IKEA today and LOVED it! I think ALL stores should have child care while you shop. Why hasn't that caught on??? :) Anyway, It really was fun, the food was great, super cheap and they even had children's tables, plates, etc.... They had everything you could imagine and it was just overall a fun shopping experience. Its like a one stop shop for decorating and furnishing a house. Have any of you ever been there?

I'm not crazy....

So, I watched an incredible Dr Phil the other day. He had All the Sears Drs on to answer moms and dads parenting questions. It was So nice to hear Dr Phil call them the Gold standard on child rearing advice. I mean, I already knew that but now everyone elses who watches knows. :) Anyway, I was talking to my sil(sister n law) yesterday and she was remarking about how she had read on someones elses blog that they were glad that they didn't bring up attachment parenting at all because it comes with such a negative stigma. Now, this is where I get confused. I notice when I talk to alot of people (friends and strangers) about Sears or AP they look at me like I am some crazy hippie who doesn't know what I am talking about, or they just tune me out because they think its extreme. What I am wondering is why this whole Sears and AP style parenting comes with such a negative stigma? Whats funny is that alot of the same people who tune me out are those people who probably, without knowing it, are attachment parenters. But because no one listens they wouldn't know that. Attachment parenting is just about listening to your childs needs and responding to them. Obviously, there is more involved but that is what I feel it is in a nutshell. I was asking Des yesterday what she thought made people tune out or whatever and the only think she could think of was the fact that I go to La Leche League and some may have a misconception about the people there. So, then you have the stigma to LLL. I guess since I think its important to nurse my child and I need a chance to socialize with other moms a couple times a month then I am a hippie who lets my kid run my life. OK, that may be extreme but I'm venting! :) That's another thing, people think its odd that I am so passionate about certain parenting things and breastfeeding. Shouldn't you be passionate about things that you feel are good for your children? If you really believe in something don't you want to share it? Isn't that what we do with our faith, why not with other things we believe. How are we going to educate people about this stuff if just sit around with our hands folded on our laps. I am SO glad that people were willing to educate me so that I could make an educated decision about what to do with my own children. Anyway, I just wonder what people really think when they hear Dr Sears or attachment parenting and if anyone has any other insight into this. Sorry if I am being repetitive or rambling but this post took about 2 hours to write this morning because with my kids its hard to just sit down and do something uninterrupted. I got it done though! :)

Public Apology

I wanted to make a public apology to someone that was offended by one of my postings. I know we offend people sometimes by our views and opinions but my wording and something specific was hurtful and was brought to my attention this evening so I thought I would let her know that I was sorry. What better way to do it then here, where the offense took place.
I few weeks ago we were discussing Public vs Private schools and I made a comment about how my sister n law felt about them. It was brought to my attention that I was misrepresenting what she felt and what I said was hurtful to her. SO, since I am not a fan of hurting peoples feelings and like for any unrest to be resolved I want to apologize from the bottom of my heart! I also would like to amend what I said about her feelings on private schools. She does not think that they should all be shut down but simply prefers that her children go to a public school. I knew that she was passionate about that and was not accurate in what I thought her feelings toward private schools were. Again, Missy, I am very sorry!
Isn't it great to have the opportunity to humble myself in front of friends, family and God and I don't even have to leave my couch! :) Thank goodness for blogs and laptops! LOL
Missy, I hope that you read this and know that I truly am sorry and that you are family and that you are loved and accepted.

I dont have much to blog about but I figured I would just because I had a few minutes. I had to put up Ashers 1 yr pics just becasue I think hes cute! :) I am a little biased.

On a totally random thought, Jennifers new movie comes out on the 26th! YAY! Its a girls night out to see "Catch and Release". Whos in?

Yah, I dont have anything else to say really so this is officially the most pointless post as of yet. Well, with the exception of my adorable 1 yr old. :)

Happy New Year!!!!

Welcome to 2007! I hope that everyone had a Great New Years and that everyone is looking forward to 07. I am recouping from our new years bash. Des and I threw a a party here at our house and it was a blast!!! John and Elizabeth were here visiting which made my new year complete! We had about 15 or so people over and we broke in Daniels new Karaoke system. I cant even tell you how much fun we had, or at least I had! I will have to put on a clip pf all of us chicks singing! We danced a little, drank a little (or a lot), sang a little and hung out. There were some people upstairs watching the History channel or something.......lol.....party on! HaHaHa! As long as everyone was having fun. :) Anyway, it was by far my best New Years to date.....until next year! :)
Sara, girl, we still have to sing "Downtown" and Des, I still want to see you do "Walk like an Egyptian". Anyway, I hope that everyone is recovered and back up and running for work today! Did anyone else do anything special?

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all of you on this special day! I am just sitting beside my tree that is all lit up with presents all around and stockings full. Christmas carols are playing and I am waiting for the rest of my family to awake. :) I still have a hard time sleeping on Christmas Eve. I guess I am still a kid at heart! Anyway, I wanted to wish everyone a VERY Merry Christmas and dont forget why we are celebrating today. God gave us incredible gift in the form of his son! Now, I am sure that it wasnt on Dec25th exactly but I think its a good enough day to remeber it! :) Go have fun with your friends and families!